"Success in a cancer diagnosis is not measured in surviving or succumbing,
but in the insights gained and the transformations achieved during the Journey."
"Success in a cancer diagnosis is not measured in surviving or succumbing,
but in the insights gained and the transformations achieved during the Journey."
My story
My radical healing story began a year before diagnosis.
In 2018 my husband and I were building the dream home that we had designed together in a little piece of paradise in the middle of Florida. My health, which had always been frail, was on a steep decline.
For the prior 5 years, health issues had become more challenging and concerning.
Having been a sickly child and young adult, I had learned early on to remedy things using natural means. I knew that my body did not respond well to pharmaceuticals and so I had a well-rounded understanding of natural healing options. I had already transformed my life considerably; not using chemicals for cleaning the home, being conscientious of materials that were brought into the home or worn on my body, using natural products for personal hygiene, and eating mostly organic foods. Yet despite all my efforts my health continued to go downhill.
By this time I had come to an understanding; there was something else involved in all of my health issues. It was clear that my mindset was impacting my well-being. I began searching for answers. I didn't know how I was creating disease nor how I would fix it but, as usual, I would be relentless in my search for solutions.
This is when I found Doctor Joe Dispenza.
He was being interviewed as he was promoting his latest book “Becoming Supernatural.” The introductory clip to the interview had him stating “It's a scientific fact that the hormones of stress downregulate genes and create disease. Long-term effects. Human beings, because of the size of the neocortex, we can turn on the stress response just by thought alone, as we think about our problems, we turn on those chemicals. That means then our thoughts could make us sick. So, if it's possible that our thoughts could make us sick then, is it possible that our thoughts can make us well?
The answer is absolutely yes.”
That was it! I was immediately hooked. I watched the rest of the interview, bought three of his books, downloaded several of his meditations and began the work. I was relentless in educating myself as to the mechanisms that had driven me to bring disease into my body. I read and re-read his books and I meditated for hours.
I did his work for a year and two months, yet my health decline seemed to be accelerating. I was so unwell I had to get medical help, at which point I was diagnosed with stage 3C metastatic ovarian cancer.
I always tell people things are not always as they seem, because that was the case for me.
Once the diagnosis was made of course and as it usually goes, there was the rush into surgery. In the midst of all this doctor driven chaos however there were a lot of serendipities that came into play, making things flow easily for my husband Scott and I. This was a result of the work that I had been doing for over a year.
The oncologist could not tell me what kind of surgery I would have. I could wake up to find that they only used robotic surgery, or I could wake up with an incision from my sternum all the way to my pubic bone.
Just as he was building uncertainty into my life, circumstances would soon deliver some of his own. In the middle of surgery as he had removed all my reproductive system, he had the pathologist check the tissues for cancer and every single one came back negative. He had the samples checked again, and again they came back negative.
Things are not always as they seem.
In the year that I had done the work I had already eliminated cancer from my reproductive system. Granted, the metastasis that was lodged in the lymphatic system above my left kidney was still there and was removed surgically during the same operation. That tumor tested positive for ovarian cancer.
Not even a week after surgery I was scheduled to return for a follow up appointment where I would be rushed through the sign-up system for chemotherapy and potentially radiation. Based on the results of the operation I thought that the prognosis was going to be much better than I thought it originally was, yet the Oncologists insisted that this was a rare form of ovarian cancer that had metastasized to the lymphatic system and would soon spread. In a daze I stumbled to the little room where a nurse brought piles of paperwork for me to sign agreeing to go through yet another operation to place a port in my chest. I did as I was told yet I was not there.
By the grace of intuition after I arrived home and giving myself some time to digest everything that had just happened, I heard a strong voice inside of me saying, “You are not doing chemotherapy.” That immeasurable instance I felt a relief that could have only been achieved if I had been told that it was all a dream. I felt healed, I felt a relief I could not explain. And I did not question that, voice but followed its instruction.
The next day I called the nurses and told them I was not having the surgery and not having chemotherapy and I was instantly scheduled for an appointment with the Oncologist. During this visit the doctor proceeded to explain to me how the cancer would progress, that the tumors would be inoperable and that I would be sorry. I thanked him for educating me and I told him I was not doing chemo. He was ready to fire me as a patient, but I convinced him to keep me on so that he could track my progress and assist me with any end-of-life support. He agreed.
At this point I went back home convinced the doctor was right and prepared myself for death. I continue doing Dr. Joe Dispenza’s work, but the purpose of it was to find myself, to find peace and to die in grace.
What happened in the span of the following year was by all accounts miraculous.
Remission!
By doing the work I came to many awakenings. My primary issue was inauthenticity. Having always been a people pleaser and prioritizing what everyone's needs were before my own I had entrenched myself into a persona that was self-harming. My thoughts were constantly filled with judgment, fear, anger, frustration but mostly terror. Terror at life, terror from the past, terror at the future. The vessel that contained my being was corroded by lowly emotions.
2019 and 2020 were extraordinary years for me.
Even while I continued to do the work my body continued to decline. Or so it seemed.
I was incapacitated with dysautonomia, crippled with a horrific pain syndrome, emotional breakdowns and so much more. But underneath the surface something was happening that I couldn't see.
In preparation for death my body found health.
My work was focused on taking in everything in my life that I did not want to leave. I worked relentlessly for hours and hours even as my body could not move from bed. I visualized all the events of my life, all the activities that I loved, all the people that I adored, my doggies, my garden, my jewelry making, and I took them in and took it all in one by one, fully, completely until there was no separation between me and the things in my life. My body could perish but the things that I had taken in would come with me.
Then I began working on my next life. In the face of a decaying body, I could not convince myself of the possibility of a future as Yvonne. What I could do is begin planning my next incarnation. I decided I would be born a beautiful girl in Italy, to parents that came from a long line of jewelry makers and I would know everything about making jewelry from them and I would have all the supplies I needed because the family would have all of the things that you could need to make jewelry and I would live next to Murano so that I could learn how to make glass.
The excitement! The enthusiasm! The anticipation that I felt in my visualizations saturated my being. What magnificent joy to start again, to be young, to be fresh, to be healthy, to be whole and to have permission to do exactly what I wanted to do.
What I didn't know was that my body didn't understand that these emotions were for another lifetime. These emotions were impacting my current biology. And this is how I healed.
Experiencing authenticity even if it was for another lifetime.
In 2018 my husband and I were building the dream home that we had designed together in a little piece of paradise in the middle of Florida. My health, which had always been frail, was on a steep decline.
For the prior 5 years, health issues had become more challenging and concerning.
Having been a sickly child and young adult, I had learned early on to remedy things using natural means. I knew that my body did not respond well to pharmaceuticals and so I had a well-rounded understanding of natural healing options. I had already transformed my life considerably; not using chemicals for cleaning the home, being conscientious of materials that were brought into the home or worn on my body, using natural products for personal hygiene, and eating mostly organic foods. Yet despite all my efforts my health continued to go downhill.
By this time I had come to an understanding; there was something else involved in all of my health issues. It was clear that my mindset was impacting my well-being. I began searching for answers. I didn't know how I was creating disease nor how I would fix it but, as usual, I would be relentless in my search for solutions.
This is when I found Doctor Joe Dispenza.
He was being interviewed as he was promoting his latest book “Becoming Supernatural.” The introductory clip to the interview had him stating “It's a scientific fact that the hormones of stress downregulate genes and create disease. Long-term effects. Human beings, because of the size of the neocortex, we can turn on the stress response just by thought alone, as we think about our problems, we turn on those chemicals. That means then our thoughts could make us sick. So, if it's possible that our thoughts could make us sick then, is it possible that our thoughts can make us well?
The answer is absolutely yes.”
That was it! I was immediately hooked. I watched the rest of the interview, bought three of his books, downloaded several of his meditations and began the work. I was relentless in educating myself as to the mechanisms that had driven me to bring disease into my body. I read and re-read his books and I meditated for hours.
I did his work for a year and two months, yet my health decline seemed to be accelerating. I was so unwell I had to get medical help, at which point I was diagnosed with stage 3C metastatic ovarian cancer.
I always tell people things are not always as they seem, because that was the case for me.
Once the diagnosis was made of course and as it usually goes, there was the rush into surgery. In the midst of all this doctor driven chaos however there were a lot of serendipities that came into play, making things flow easily for my husband Scott and I. This was a result of the work that I had been doing for over a year.
The oncologist could not tell me what kind of surgery I would have. I could wake up to find that they only used robotic surgery, or I could wake up with an incision from my sternum all the way to my pubic bone.
Just as he was building uncertainty into my life, circumstances would soon deliver some of his own. In the middle of surgery as he had removed all my reproductive system, he had the pathologist check the tissues for cancer and every single one came back negative. He had the samples checked again, and again they came back negative.
Things are not always as they seem.
In the year that I had done the work I had already eliminated cancer from my reproductive system. Granted, the metastasis that was lodged in the lymphatic system above my left kidney was still there and was removed surgically during the same operation. That tumor tested positive for ovarian cancer.
Not even a week after surgery I was scheduled to return for a follow up appointment where I would be rushed through the sign-up system for chemotherapy and potentially radiation. Based on the results of the operation I thought that the prognosis was going to be much better than I thought it originally was, yet the Oncologists insisted that this was a rare form of ovarian cancer that had metastasized to the lymphatic system and would soon spread. In a daze I stumbled to the little room where a nurse brought piles of paperwork for me to sign agreeing to go through yet another operation to place a port in my chest. I did as I was told yet I was not there.
By the grace of intuition after I arrived home and giving myself some time to digest everything that had just happened, I heard a strong voice inside of me saying, “You are not doing chemotherapy.” That immeasurable instance I felt a relief that could have only been achieved if I had been told that it was all a dream. I felt healed, I felt a relief I could not explain. And I did not question that, voice but followed its instruction.
The next day I called the nurses and told them I was not having the surgery and not having chemotherapy and I was instantly scheduled for an appointment with the Oncologist. During this visit the doctor proceeded to explain to me how the cancer would progress, that the tumors would be inoperable and that I would be sorry. I thanked him for educating me and I told him I was not doing chemo. He was ready to fire me as a patient, but I convinced him to keep me on so that he could track my progress and assist me with any end-of-life support. He agreed.
At this point I went back home convinced the doctor was right and prepared myself for death. I continue doing Dr. Joe Dispenza’s work, but the purpose of it was to find myself, to find peace and to die in grace.
What happened in the span of the following year was by all accounts miraculous.
Remission!
By doing the work I came to many awakenings. My primary issue was inauthenticity. Having always been a people pleaser and prioritizing what everyone's needs were before my own I had entrenched myself into a persona that was self-harming. My thoughts were constantly filled with judgment, fear, anger, frustration but mostly terror. Terror at life, terror from the past, terror at the future. The vessel that contained my being was corroded by lowly emotions.
2019 and 2020 were extraordinary years for me.
Even while I continued to do the work my body continued to decline. Or so it seemed.
I was incapacitated with dysautonomia, crippled with a horrific pain syndrome, emotional breakdowns and so much more. But underneath the surface something was happening that I couldn't see.
In preparation for death my body found health.
My work was focused on taking in everything in my life that I did not want to leave. I worked relentlessly for hours and hours even as my body could not move from bed. I visualized all the events of my life, all the activities that I loved, all the people that I adored, my doggies, my garden, my jewelry making, and I took them in and took it all in one by one, fully, completely until there was no separation between me and the things in my life. My body could perish but the things that I had taken in would come with me.
Then I began working on my next life. In the face of a decaying body, I could not convince myself of the possibility of a future as Yvonne. What I could do is begin planning my next incarnation. I decided I would be born a beautiful girl in Italy, to parents that came from a long line of jewelry makers and I would know everything about making jewelry from them and I would have all the supplies I needed because the family would have all of the things that you could need to make jewelry and I would live next to Murano so that I could learn how to make glass.
The excitement! The enthusiasm! The anticipation that I felt in my visualizations saturated my being. What magnificent joy to start again, to be young, to be fresh, to be healthy, to be whole and to have permission to do exactly what I wanted to do.
What I didn't know was that my body didn't understand that these emotions were for another lifetime. These emotions were impacting my current biology. And this is how I healed.
Experiencing authenticity even if it was for another lifetime.
Want to read more about my radical healing journey?
Sign up to be notified when my book: "A Journey to Authenticity" comes out!
Sign up to be notified when my book: "A Journey to Authenticity" comes out!